The good, the bad and the original.

When I was little, the one piece of advice my sister always stressed upon was that it was very important to be unique. She’d say, “Anybody can be cool, but not Everybody has what it takes to be original”. Sometimes I’d think she said that just to spite me because I copied her lot. You know how little sisters are! 😀 I know now, being a sixteen year old, originality is something I rarely see. But then, is that all that’s important? Unique people are fascinating and interesting even but, they’re not always good. Their speciality sometimes takes a detour through psycho town. At times like that i realize I’d rather have a considerate, good person in my life than a “unique” pain in the neck.

Freedom.

What comes to your mind when you think of the word?

My think box is flooded with things like:

loneliness, courage, desire, bird, adult, emancipation, college, 1947, democracy, wind, wisdom, latenights, party, people….. And it goes on.

But you know what real freedom is? Freedom from judgement. Some people just go around walking the earth like they own it. I’m one of ’em. Ironically, when another self-centered know-it-all comes around talking to me like they own me, THAT, I’m not okay with.

Some people can be plain horrible. Inspiring but horrible. I met someone like that. Someone who had me worshipping him from day one. His high authority probably added to my reverence for him. The most inspiring teacher I’d ever met. In course of time the inspiration turned to intimidation and that my friends is what I’m here venting about. The man who first sowed my interest in the subject now makes me hate it. How am I supposed to deal with that?

I just tell myself and everyone else out there who have to go through this,

Don’t you worry, don’t you worry child
See heaven has a plan for you
                   -Swedish House Mafia.

When you’re in the ocean, be the shark. It’s better to be feared than to fear. There will always be dominating, inconsiderate people out there who just don’t give a damn. Getting through it with a straight face seems good enough for someone my age.

I wanted to be him from my first class. I wanted to be the man who now scares the hell out of me. This paradox of sorts has now got me rethinking who I wanna be.

Is it more important to be that demanding person who constantly has everyone under her spell or a noble, kind person procuring the attention and warmth of people who simply love being around me? So, I once again rely on the sole fact that I could be the grey. Not black, not white. The exception I always dreamed of being. What about you?

Survival of the fittest

Mom told me when I was ten, “Being a good person is very important. Never let anyone change how pure and forgiving you are. But don’t ever let someone use your niceness against you”. That ‘warning’ didn’t exactly make me any less naive but, I did look at the world from a different perspective. Every day of life has been an adventure, with me trying to figure out how the world works. Endless questions, obsessions and certain moments of truth, aren’t they what life’s all about?

Why do we ask for advice from other people? When no one can fully understand another person. We each have entirely different reasoning and beliefs. This is something I have accepted truly only today. It is very important to be happy with who you are. You’re amazing as an individual person. Don’t ever let anyone tell you otherwise. But, revealing exactly who you are to the whole world is not a good idea. As good as people are, they can also be pretty sly. Those people whom you think dropped down from heaven, they all have two sides. 

It is even more important to know yourself. You can’t go about conquering the world, when you’re not sure what you want in the first place. Give everything a chance. Thing’s aren’t always what 

It isn’t okay to be who you are, if you’re someone who speaks your heart wherever you go. This world will eat you right up. And, it sure as hell isn’t okay if you’re someone who think people mean everything they say. I was that person for a very long time. For those of you out there who actually believe in that, it’s time you look at life from a different perspective. Nothing has ever hurt me more than finding out how wrong I’ve been about someone. Because, for a head strong person like me, being right is everything. 

Have you ever met a new person and just connected instantly? And you can almost see them in your future with you? What I didn’t realize was no one really speaks their mind. Whatever they say is very far from reality. This trusting nature has landed me more disappointments than I can count. A little innocence is good but being so trusting doesn’t really get anywhere. 

When people ask a question, the truth isn’t always what the want. Sometimes giving them what they want is the best thing you can do. And most important of all to every girl out there who’s got a boy making her feel bad about herself: Boys will always be obnoxious. Even the good ones! They have a different way of life and entirely different personalities. Your wants and needs are entirely different from his. And, as for the bad ones, no guy is cute enough to be allowed to make you feel less than you are! Love life, don’t waste a minute of it over insecurities. 🙂