“Do you ever start off saying something and end up being completely misunderstood? Don’t you just hate it when that happens? It is like the MOST frustrating thing in the world! Makes me want to bang my head against the friggin’ wall!!”
I’m going to continue with a post looking deep into misunderstandings in general. A post you can make sense of, I promise. I’ll put the estrogen on hold. 😀 Anyway, What are misunderstandings? First of all, in order to answer that question you’ll have to blame either the speaker or the listener or both of ‘em partly. That is something I’m not going to do because no one is really to blame. It’s like a verbal accident, you can’t blame anyone but fate! IF you do blame someone, all you’re going to do is set them off.
Misunderstandings are bad just by themselves. Whatever you meant to say, to score some nice points do the exact opposite and land you some negatives resulting in a double loss for you. I understand how upsetting that must be, I really do. Then, like always, we do the same thing when something upsets us, lash out real bad. You blame the other person for being utterly obnoxious to everything you say and the fight gets bigger. Another case scenario would be that there was no chance for the “blame routine”. The misunderstanding can make things bad enough on it’s own, bad enough for the fight to explode right there and you just stop talking after that, giving no chance to explanations or the blaming.
Why do misunderstandings happen? Or for more originality, what are the mother of misunderstandings? (See what I did there? 😀 :P)
- The speaker and the listener don’t share vocabulary or slang or even attitude sometimes.
- When the conversation is virtual.
- Unintentional word-play by the speaker.
- Too much sarcasm.
- When either one, or both of you are in a bad mood.
The first and the second share some common ground. They’re both completely accidental and can’t be helped. When two “different” (if you know what I mean) people converse, the way they present themselves will obviously be different. When the conversation is through text, emails or IMs, you just have to accept it. It is impossible to convey tone through text no matter how many smiley faces you use. Unless they’re your perfect pair who simply knows you, every nook and corner, texting about important things is always disastrous.
Are you sarcastic? I am! In fact, sarcasm is my thing 😀 and it turns out to be quite the problem sometimes. When you’re this person who thrives on sarcasm, there will be times when people get confused. Sarcasm is the smart people problem when it comes to misunderstandings. The stupid people (forgive the bluntness I am just really annoyed) suffer with the case of the unintentional word-play. Without even realising it they make innuendoes that they simply can’t take back and this has chances of getting them into a serious pickle.
One of the deadliest of misunderstandings, are the kind that happen because of some hard feelings. Maybe you slept on the wrong side of the bed or your friend or whoever it is, almost got ran over by a car or someone hurt your feelings. When you’re already irritated your level of intolerance just skyrockets; whatever people say you will hear only what you want to, or in this case, don’t want to. This blows up in a matter of minutes and generally has serious consequences.
Now since that is all wrapped up, all I want to say to you guys is that, I know misunderstandings can be really annoying. It is hard to control your anger sometimes when you’re misunderstood or blamed for absolutely nothing. People matter more than pride and ego. If that person is worth it, misunderstanding or not, resolve the fight. If they misunderstood, try harder and explain. But then some people are just total bone-heads. In that case, screw ‘em! 😀 You have better things to do.